With the height of divorce rates, the nebulous nature of our bonds to others, the debunking of many myths concerning marriage and love, i.e homosexuality, fetishes, lovers on the side, it has become painfully obvious to me that:
- Being someone’s everything or close to it is damn near impossible, and often boring. The French are among the most romantic and tragic of people concerning love, yet they are so free and comfortable sexually. One thing they openly indulge is paramours on the side of their main relationship. As a comedian friend of mine, Tim Warner stated, its like “listening to the same band for the rest of your life.” Its in our nature to get whats essential, and not one person can offer all that we need in the way that we need it. Part is from ourselves, part from one person, and the rest from some “something’s on the side”
- Fidelity or faithfulness does not guarantee loyalty. As I like to say, “I’d rather someone who fucks other people rather than fucks me over.” I do praise those who have gone far and high with “the one,” but its arrogant and narrow to think that there’s only one way to skin a turkey. In fact, there are several ways. Sure, monogamy is possible, but its not the rule. The only rules should be mutual respect, mutual affection, and mutual support.
- Nothing ever lasts forever. I am of the mind that you get into relationships to teach you something, make you stronger than before, and once the lease is up, you move on. No possessions, just progress. It’s the fear of being alone that makes each and every one of us so damn lonely, that we get into relationships, business and romantic, that make us want to jump off the Chrysler Building!!! That’s pathetic and lacks the self-respect that a good love affair or a true friendship would protect us from.
In summary, I think if you took the extra time to sit back as I have, maybe once a week, and just look at your life like you would a car, and make sure it’s running correctly or if you want to upgrade anything, you’ll find that your car cannot or does not fit your capabilities, and its time to switch gears. Perhaps you’re not taking good enough care of said car. At any rate, get some perspective, and take a good look at yourself.