* Done skilfully, rejection is taking the table cloth from the table without disturbing the delicate glass and resplendent utensils; it is saving face for the object while turning your face away from the object.
* Him/her/it is irrelevant, your technique is of the utmost importance. Nervousness and seriousness begets the same in the object. Both insults and the flattery should be met with a placid amusement, as a barrister or detective would meet any testimony from a wronged or a righteous party.
* The trouble comes with your timing and your speed. Leave too swiftly, too soon, and you’re shady. Leave too strongly and the object begins to suspect themselves of being repulsive, but will never admit this publicly. Instead, you’ll be target practice for every low-blow and reputation-killer. To avoid this:
Jobs: you give your 2 weeks notice (it is professional and allows for said job to adjust)
Places: Take a farewell tour of the sites and seem to bask in the place as if you regret leaving. They’ll say ” that’s a person who knows what we’re all about. Come back anytime!”
People: I like to, in some fashion, give them clues and sentiments that go against their most treasured principles, but slightly. Like following breadcrumbs, in the most managable pieces do they come to their OWN conclusions, with your help of course, that you’re not worth being with long-term. They think to themselves “I can do better”
* Jobs and places don’t call for the emotional validation, so let’s reserve this for people.
Should the person be a dog person (overly attentive, affectionate, and loyal), spurn them a few times when you’re about to leave. Be apathetic, untrustworthy, and mean.
If the person is a cat person (independent, retiring, low energy, odd) make yourself into a boring, basic, and loud person who likes to do things with little or no forethought. Be Jersey Shore or inner-city youth incarnate.
* The ol’ bait and switch is easier for others, but with the appropriate degree and frequency, timing and speed of the outlined tactics, you’ll get the cookie and your hand back. You won’t need to be cruel or sadistic when you’re adjusting to the game as it goes. Keeping your head level and your heart playful makes for new a start, and a clean cut of ties.